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      I JUST SAW THE AUSTRALIAN PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

      October 19, 2026

      Appointments to Men In Black Your Memories Away Are On Hold Until 2029

      September 29, 2026

      NEW REALITY TV SHOWS FOR DONALD TRUMP

      September 17, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Planet Of The Vampires (1965)

      September 15, 2026

      TOP-GROSSING ROCK REUNION TOURS THIS SUMMER

      August 24, 2026

      20 Genre-Bending College Rock Bands To Try Out After They Exist

      July 26, 2026

      FUN & HARMLESS WAYS TO MOTIVATE YOUR BLUES MUSICIAN BFF

      May 12, 2026

      EVERY LEGAL CHARGE BY HIS MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT AGAINST “THE ANDREW FORMERLY KNOWN AS PRINCE”

      May 4, 2026

      I JUST SAW THE AUSTRALIAN PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

      October 19, 2026

      Appointments to Men In Black Your Memories Away Are On Hold Until 2029

      September 29, 2026

      NEW REALITY TV SHOWS FOR DONALD TRUMP

      September 17, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Planet Of The Vampires (1965)

      September 15, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
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      Enjoy This Lighthearted But Terrifying Halloween Post!

      October 18, 2026

      A Cartoon About A Prawn

      June 13, 2026

      Two Cartoons About Apples

      June 11, 2026

      A Cartoon About Pocket Notebooks

      May 31, 2026

      Steel Toe Tommy

      September 21, 2026

      Nursery Rhymes – Ancient Wisdom Or Nefarious Lies?

      September 8, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026

      This End Up

      June 7, 2026
    • History

      An Oral History Of The Heimlich Maneuver

      September 18, 2026

      Nursery Rhymes – Ancient Wisdom Or Nefarious Lies?

      September 8, 2026

      Alexander The Great Solves The Gordian Knot

      August 3, 2026

      Clarifications From Count Dracula

      August 2, 2026

      America’s 250th Anniversary – State Motto Update

      July 27, 2026
    • Life
      1. Science
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      Modern Hail Sizes for a Golf Ball Illiterate Nation

      October 11, 2026

      SpaceX to Launch One Trillion Dollars to the Sun

      September 12, 2026

      Sociologist Who Lost 23 Pairs of Glasses Finally Cracks Mosh Pit Code

      September 11, 2026

      2026 Virtual National Labor Day Picnic Celebration: AI Agents And Assistants Only; Humans Not Invited

      September 7, 2026

      I Have Become A Haiku Master

      July 5, 2026

      Local Airline Pilot Takes Train To Work

      April 2, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      Your Child’s First Steps Toward a Life of Meaningful Labor

      October 20, 2026

      Enjoy This Lighthearted But Terrifying Halloween Post!

      October 18, 2026

      Appointments to Men In Black Your Memories Away Are On Hold Until 2029

      September 29, 2026

      Do’s and Don’ts for Your First Camping Trip 

      September 22, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
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      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      PLEASE STOP BETTING ON MY IMPROV SHOWS ON KALSHI!

      August 11, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Mr. Go (2013)

      August 4, 2026

      “Best in Show” Extreme Breed Makeover

      July 20, 2026

      DAT ASS Is Going To Revolutionize—And Democratize—Professional Sports As We Know It

      July 11, 2026
    • Podcasts
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      3. Staff Posts
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      Beyond Gulf and Lake of America, Hey! Plans To Name And Rename Bodies Of Water

      September 9, 2026

      Next Minions Movie Announced: Minions & Speech Therapists 

      September 2, 2026

      Iran Gains Control Of Reflecting Pool

      August 31, 2026

      Mindfulness App Achieves Sentience: Immediately Develops Anxiety

      August 23, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      5 Things to Check Before Buying a Home

      October 15, 2026

      Here’s a Client Testimonial About Our Realtor, Walt

      October 14, 2026

      Robot Butt is Selling a House!

      October 13, 2026

      We, the Interns at the Robot Butt, Make the Following Demands

      September 23, 2026

      5 Things to Check Before Buying a Home

      October 15, 2026

      Here’s a Client Testimonial About Our Realtor, Walt

      October 14, 2026

      Robot Butt is Selling a House!

      October 13, 2026

      We, the Interns at the Robot Butt, Make the Following Demands

      September 23, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
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      Physical Copies Of Our Real Estate Brochure Are Out Now!

      October 17, 2026

      Real Estate Listing for a Haunted House

      October 16, 2026

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Your Child’s First Steps Toward a Life of Meaningful Labor

      October 20, 2026

      I JUST SAW THE AUSTRALIAN PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

      October 19, 2026

      Enjoy This Lighthearted But Terrifying Halloween Post!

      October 18, 2026

      Physical Copies Of Our Real Estate Brochure Are Out Now!

      October 17, 2026

      Your Child’s First Steps Toward a Life of Meaningful Labor

      October 20, 2026

      I JUST SAW THE AUSTRALIAN PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

      October 19, 2026

      Enjoy This Lighthearted But Terrifying Halloween Post!

      October 18, 2026

      Physical Copies Of Our Real Estate Brochure Are Out Now!

      October 17, 2026

      Your Child’s First Steps Toward a Life of Meaningful Labor

      October 20, 2026

      I JUST SAW THE AUSTRALIAN PRIDE AND PREJUDICE

      October 19, 2026

      Enjoy This Lighthearted But Terrifying Halloween Post!

      October 18, 2026

      Physical Copies Of Our Real Estate Brochure Are Out Now!

      October 17, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Life

    Peanut Butter is Coming Back to School!

    By Rob PlotkinMarch 6, 2026

    Next Fall, every school in the country will have small children smearing peanut sandwiches on their desks like it’s 1993! As…

    Life

    Dear Neighbor, I Assume The Hammering Coming From Next Door Is You Building Your Own Coffin Because I Plan To Kill You In The Night

    By Serena BolligerMarch 3, 2026

    Hey Neighbor! I’d say Happy Monday but it’s Tuesday, which means last night was Monday night, which I guess isn’t…

    Staff Posts

    Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

    By Walt BraleyMarch 2, 2026

    We will back to our usual hours this Wednesday, March 4th, when we will have our open mic night. 12…

    Movies & TV

    Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

    By Dave HenryMarch 2, 2026

    Exhausted from the hustle and bustle of the holidays, movie goers around the world were excited to sleep through the…

    Life

    An American’s Pocket Guide To British English

    By Charles SchneiderMarch 1, 2026

    Salutations, my textual American acquaintances! It is I, the honourable Charles Joseph Nathaniel Wellington Shrewsberry, your guide and translator of…

    Life

    I’m So Excited To Spend My Life Savings On Being A Plus-One At Your Wedding

    By Julia B. KiesermanFebruary 28, 2026

    Thanks for inviting me to your wedding! I’m so happy to be included. It speaks volumes that the person I booty call every Saturday and the occasional…

    Science

    Scientists Discover Trending Chimpanzee Fashion Statement: Sticking Grass In Their Ears And Backsides

    By David GuaspariFebruary 27, 2026

    Like humans, other animals also copy seemingly pointless behaviours from one another.- Behaviour 162 (2025) 459–476 “Micky! Check this out.”…

    Fiction

    Coffee Comrades

    By Justin Leigh WebbFebruary 26, 2026

    ‘Did you know that the average cup of coffee has a lifespan of just seven minutes? Of course you didn’t.…

    Life

    Why Are Dead People Still On My Phone Contact List?

    By George BeckermanFebruary 25, 2026

    And some have been there for years. I don’t know, it feels emotionally impossible, morally wrong, even sacrilegious to evict…

    Entertainment

    John Hamm to Play Every Role in New Film, Even Inanimate Objects

    By Dave HenryFebruary 24, 2026

    Ubiquitous actor John Hamm is preparing for the roles of a lifetime, playing every role in his upcoming film, Overexposed. According…

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