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    Robot Butt

    • Entertainment
      1. Movies & TV
      2. Music
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      Some Thoughts On Masters Of The Universe (2026)

      June 4, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Dracula 3000

      June 2, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Charles Band’s Crash!

      May 26, 2026

      From the people that brought you KPop Demon Hunters

      May 23, 2026

      FUN & HARMLESS WAYS TO MOTIVATE YOUR BLUES MUSICIAN BFF

      May 12, 2026

      EVERY LEGAL CHARGE BY HIS MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT AGAINST “THE ANDREW FORMERLY KNOWN AS PRINCE”

      May 4, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      Some Thoughts On Masters Of The Universe (2026)

      June 4, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Dracula 3000

      June 2, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Charles Band’s Crash!

      May 26, 2026

      From the people that brought you KPop Demon Hunters

      May 23, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
      2. View All

      A Cartoon About Pocket Notebooks

      May 31, 2026

      You Won’t Believe How Much This Panel From A 1950’s Horror Comic Is Still Scary Today

      May 18, 2026

      A Cartoon About Alarm Clocks

      February 4, 2026

      Happy Holidays! Here’s A Cartoon About Christmas Trees

      December 25, 2025

      Elephant in the Examination Room

      April 26, 2026

      Coffee Comrades

      February 26, 2026

      THE THREE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE ARE NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS

      January 23, 2026

      Beckett versus Beckett

      October 4, 2025
    • History

      Top Hegseth-Like Quotes Throughout History, And From My Neighbor Phil

      May 3, 2026

      Seder hopping with the Passover King

      May 15, 2025

      College Students Suggest Causes for Fossilized Vomit

      April 30, 2025

      Oedipus’ Lament

      April 18, 2025

      10 Relevant Events in History that were Originated by a Joke

      February 20, 2025
    • Life
      1. Science
      2. Thoughts
      3. View All

      We Put These AI Features in Your Faucet Whether You Like it Or Not

      May 20, 2026

      Anecdotal Evidence AI Isn’t As Smart As Our Parents Think It Is

      May 16, 2026

      I Dated Four AI Boyfriends So You Don’t Have To

      April 27, 2026

      Peanut Butter is Coming Back to School!

      March 6, 2026

      Local Airline Pilot Takes Train To Work

      April 2, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      A Love Poem to Greenland written by J.D. Vance

      May 4, 2025

      Detailed Analysis Of My Performative Instagram Photo Dump

      June 6, 2026

      Your Airline Pilot is Going Through a Really Bad Breakup

      June 5, 2026

      An Open Letter to the Saltwater Taffy Still Sitting In My Kitchen

      June 3, 2026

      How to Stay Calm When Cursed Out by a Teenage Meth Tycoon While Teaching the Pythagorean Theorem

      June 1, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
      3. View All

      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      I Want All The Office Chairs and Tables Stored Where They Definitely Won’t Get Destroyed: Underneath The Wrestling Ring

      May 28, 2026

      Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super Bowl

      February 21, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      LIFEHACK: When Your Dad Texts You About Not Understanding The Bad Bunny Halftime Show, Reuse Your Responses From The Kendrick Lamar Halftime Show

      February 8, 2026
    • Podcasts
    • Uncanny Valley
      1. Breaking News
      2. Company Blog
      3. Staff Posts
      4. View All

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026

      HEARTBREAKING: Middle Schooler With Mad Libs Book Out Of Bad Words

      January 26, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      SPONSORED POST: Two Lawyers Standing Back To Back On A Billboard

      May 23, 2026

      Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same Day

      May 15, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      SPONSORED POST: Two Lawyers Standing Back To Back On A Billboard

      May 23, 2026

      Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same Day

      May 15, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
      3. Submission Guidelines
      4. View All

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Jason’s Dozen: A Friday the 13th Humor Collection

      October 13, 2023

      Halloween Compendium of Terror: A Spooky Humor Anthology

      October 31, 2022

      Detailed Analysis Of My Performative Instagram Photo Dump

      June 6, 2026

      Your Airline Pilot is Going Through a Really Bad Breakup

      June 5, 2026

      Some Thoughts On Masters Of The Universe (2026)

      June 4, 2026

      An Open Letter to the Saltwater Taffy Still Sitting In My Kitchen

      June 3, 2026

      Detailed Analysis Of My Performative Instagram Photo Dump

      June 6, 2026

      Your Airline Pilot is Going Through a Really Bad Breakup

      June 5, 2026

      Some Thoughts On Masters Of The Universe (2026)

      June 4, 2026

      An Open Letter to the Saltwater Taffy Still Sitting In My Kitchen

      June 3, 2026

      Detailed Analysis Of My Performative Instagram Photo Dump

      June 6, 2026

      Your Airline Pilot is Going Through a Really Bad Breakup

      June 5, 2026

      Some Thoughts On Masters Of The Universe (2026)

      June 4, 2026

      An Open Letter to the Saltwater Taffy Still Sitting In My Kitchen

      June 3, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Movies & TV

    Movie Theater Popcorn Almost Makes It To Regal Coca Cola Ad

    By Robot Butt News Corp.January 20, 2026

    They’re calling it the “little popcorn who could,” across the nation. This seemingly regular order of theater popcorn has become…

    Life

    VISIT BEAUTIFUL ROCK BOTTOM!

    By Chris TurnerJanuary 19, 2026

    The Destination You Never Planned For But Somehow Always End Up At So you’ve moved back in with your parents…

    Life

    Do You Want To Delete Facebook? Here Are 10 Places You Can Still Post Photos Of Your Cool Truck

    By Walt BraleyJanuary 18, 2026

    For over a decade, the one thing keeping most of the population from finally deleting their Facebook and getting out…

    Movies & TV

    Gilligan’s Island Press Conference: The Skipper Tilts at Windmills

    By Paul Cesarini And Andy ShocketJanuary 17, 2026

    At a hastily called press conference flanked by Gilligan armed with a bamboo shaft, The Skipper accused the Professor and…

    Breaking News

    Person Craving Hot Dog Requests We Do Literally No Further Investigating

    By Robot Butt News Corp.January 16, 2026

    We’ve decided to honor their wishes at this time. Our thoughts are with their family through this difficult process.

    All Content

    Only Thing Stopping Man From Participating In Dry January Is Knowledge That 9 Modelos “Not Going To Drink Themselves” 

    By Robot Butt News Corp.January 15, 2026

    CHICAGO IL – In an astounding scientific discovery, a local dry January participant and the writer of this very article…

    Life

    An Open letter from the Doctor Who Claimed Peeing on Jellyfish Stings Helps

    By Alec BrownJanuary 14, 2026

    To whom it may concern, I don’t know how this got so out of hand. This isn’t even my area…

    Life

    You Can All Stop Worrying about AI. I Wrote a Policy Document

    By Rob PlotkinJanuary 13, 2026

    Subject: AI Policy Update Dear Colleagues, As we begin the new school year, I would like to address the elephant…

    Politics

     Popular Acclaim for the Grand Ballroom

    By Tom NavratilJanuary 13, 2026

    “The family farm used to be the backbone of this country, but now I tip my hat to all that…

    Entertainment

    200 Sweeps Responsey Awards: Backstage Drama and Notable Absences Define The Internet’s Biggest Night

    By Mike TodascoJanuary 12, 2026

    RFC-9110.NET—In a night that surprised absolutely no one, Status Code 200 continued its unprecedented dominance at the HTTP Response Status…

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