Warner Bros’ recent announcement of a release date for Denis Villeneuve’s next film, widely rumored to be a sequel to his sandswept blockbuster, Dune 2, has had ripple effects across the industry both at home and abroad. Across the pond, the fine folk at Heyday Pictures, makers of such popular family favorites as the Harry Potter series and A Marriage Story, have responded to the announcement with a major shift in plans for the sequel to its chocolatey sleeper hit, Wonka.
“Timothée was already on board for both the Dune and Wonka sequels, so we figured it just made sense to take a combined approach,” says producer Roger Kincaid. “If we can get away with just paying him for one, so much the better. Besides, this is what audiences are asking for!”
Wonka 2: Chocolate Messiah is expected to hit cinemas in 2025. The reworked plot follows William of the House of Wonka immediately after the events of the first Wonka film, which concluded with the eponymous hero defeating his enemy chocolatiers and setting his sights on total candy dominance worldwide.
The filmmakers are keeping quiet about plot details. “I don’t want to spoil things too much, but let me just say: Oompa-Loompa uprising.”
Attendees of the most recent Comic-Con were delighted to catch a glimpse of some early footage: “It opens with a wide shot of a rain-swept wasteland, covered in gray mist. A dark chocolate river winds between sheer-faced candy rocks and mysterious black licorice trees. Suddenly, bursting through the cotton-candy cloud cover, a glittering machine noiselessly descends: it’s a glass elevator. Cue the bagpipes!”
“We cut to a pool of bubbling dark chocolate, surrounded by several short servants with bad haircuts. Slowly, out of the thick liquid, a man with a velvet top hat and shiny cane emerges, like Kurtz in Apocalypse Now. Only, it’s Wonka. The scene was terrifying, but it also really made me want fondue.”
The producers insist that the film has no relation to either Dune or its sequel.
“The Dune world is all about spice addiction, right? That’s quite different from the sugar addiction we explore. Although, yes, their eyes do still turn blue when they partake in the mélange. We’ve also introduced a contingency of prophetic witches, but they are a lot more fun in this one and spend most of the movie trying to foresee who will find the golden ticket.”
While it remains to be seen whether the Dune-ification of Wonka and other films represents a new “golden ticket” for the film industry, there are already big plans in store for building out the Wonka Cinematic Universe even further over the coming years. Sequels, prequels, and spin-offs are all on the table.
“Originally, we were going to call this one Children of Wonka, but we realized that that title works a lot better as a rebrand of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, so expect a new version of that in a few years if we can keep Timothée around. From an acting perspective, I think he will enjoy the unique directions we are hoping to take his character. We’re still working out the concept, but I can tell you that the part where he evolves into a gigantic gummy worm is going to be wild.”
When asked to comment, Mr. Chalamet only mumbled that they better keep the candy coming, while absently brushing stray granules of sugar from his upper lip.
Although he looks tired from an unrelenting schedule that includes acting in both sequels, wacky ads for Chanel, and keeping up with at least one Kardashian, this brilliant new dramatic visionary remains a compelling force to watch. Many insiders in Hollywood agree that his shining blue eyes have pierced them to their very cores, eliciting from their mouths what can only be described as praise. Lisan al Gaib, indeed.
