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    Robot Butt

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      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Spanglish

      June 16, 2026

      Sucking Dick Is Fascist

      June 14, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Masters of the Universe (1987)

      June 9, 2026

      FUN & HARMLESS WAYS TO MOTIVATE YOUR BLUES MUSICIAN BFF

      May 12, 2026

      EVERY LEGAL CHARGE BY HIS MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT AGAINST “THE ANDREW FORMERLY KNOWN AS PRINCE”

      May 4, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Spanglish

      June 16, 2026

      Sucking Dick Is Fascist

      June 14, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
      2. View All

      A Cartoon About A Prawn

      June 13, 2026

      Two Cartoons About Apples

      June 11, 2026

      A Cartoon About Pocket Notebooks

      May 31, 2026

      You Won’t Believe How Much This Panel From A 1950’s Horror Comic Is Still Scary Today

      May 18, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026

      This End Up

      June 7, 2026

      Elephant in the Examination Room

      April 26, 2026

      Coffee Comrades

      February 26, 2026
    • History

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      Report Card Comments for William, Duke of Normandy

      June 15, 2026

      Top Hegseth-Like Quotes Throughout History, And From My Neighbor Phil

      May 3, 2026

      Seder hopping with the Passover King

      May 15, 2025

      College Students Suggest Causes for Fossilized Vomit

      April 30, 2025
    • Life
      1. Science
      2. Thoughts
      3. View All

      Scientists Say Newly Discovered InstaCart Receipts Reveal Surprising, Interesting Insights Into Habits, Lifestyle of Blue Whales

      June 20, 2026

      We Put These AI Features in Your Faucet Whether You Like it Or Not

      May 20, 2026

      Anecdotal Evidence AI Isn’t As Smart As Our Parents Think It Is

      May 16, 2026

      I Dated Four AI Boyfriends So You Don’t Have To

      April 27, 2026

      Local Airline Pilot Takes Train To Work

      April 2, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      A Love Poem to Greenland written by J.D. Vance

      May 4, 2025

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026

      Robot Butt’s Real Estate Investing Tips

      June 12, 2026

      Nietzsche’s Yelp Reviews

      June 10, 2026

      TOP 12 REJECTED NAMES FOR ‘HELLOFRESH’

      June 8, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
      3. View All

      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      TRUMP SPORTING HEADLINES PREDICTED TO APPEAR THIS SUMMER

      June 17, 2026

      I Want All The Office Chairs and Tables Stored Where They Definitely Won’t Get Destroyed: Underneath The Wrestling Ring

      May 28, 2026

      Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super Bowl

      February 21, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026
    • Podcasts
    • Uncanny Valley
      1. Breaking News
      2. Company Blog
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      TRUMP SPORTING HEADLINES PREDICTED TO APPEAR THIS SUMMER

      June 17, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      SPONSORED POST: Two Lawyers Standing Back To Back On A Billboard

      May 23, 2026

      Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same Day

      May 15, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      TRUMP SPORTING HEADLINES PREDICTED TO APPEAR THIS SUMMER

      June 17, 2026

      SPONSORED POST: Two Lawyers Standing Back To Back On A Billboard

      May 23, 2026

      Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same Day

      May 15, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
      3. Submission Guidelines
      4. View All

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Jason’s Dozen: A Friday the 13th Humor Collection

      October 13, 2023

      Halloween Compendium of Terror: A Spooky Humor Anthology

      October 31, 2022

      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      David Blaine Delivers Remarks After Being Sworn In As Attorney General

      June 23, 2026

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      David Blaine Delivers Remarks After Being Sworn In As Attorney General

      June 23, 2026

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      David Blaine Delivers Remarks After Being Sworn In As Attorney General

      June 23, 2026

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Articles

    Clear Signs a Woman Is Lying About Sexual Assault

    By Lillian StoneJanuary 4, 2018

    1. She once ordered from the Cheesecake Factory Fit N’ Flirty cocktail menu. 2. She has a generally gregarious personality and…

    Life

    How to Lose a Guy in 1-25 Texts

    By Nicole WalkowJanuary 3, 2018

    1) Text him something simple like “Hey!” Then send him a picture of a dead bird. 2) Send a follow-up text…

    Breaking News

    Man Resolves to Abandon New Year’s Resolutions Faster Than Ever

    By Robot Butt News Corp.January 2, 2018

    GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. – With the clean slate of a brand-new year upon him, local insurance salesman James Crosby has resolved…

    Articles

    End of 2017 Self Check-In Quiz

    By Megan SchwartzDecember 31, 2017

    Hooray! It’s finally time to ring in the new year! As you’re planning for 2018, now’s a great time to do…

    Life

    Cute Diseases to Catch on the Subway That Scream ‘New Year, New Me!’

    By Kimberly BollardDecember 31, 2017

    It’s that time of year again. It’s the time when we reflect on the past year, and make resolutions for…

    Breaking News

    Mall Santas Return to Pasture for Next 11 Months

    By Robot Butt News Corp.December 29, 2017

    As the holiday season comes to a close, a yearly tradition returns to the Midwestern United States: The return migration…

    Entertainment

    100 Words or Less: On ‘The Last Jedi’

    By David MoganDecember 29, 2017

    The Last Jedi is the newest installment in the extremely popular Ruined My Childhood franchise, the $8 billion global phenomenon…

    Life

    Life Directions From Your Self-Righteous GPS

    By Ilana M. RubinDecember 29, 2017

    We’re taking 6th Avenue. Despite usual traffic, you will arrive at your destination by 4 p.m. Okay, let’s go! In…

    Breaking News

    Day After Christmas Officially Tired of Playing Second Fiddle to Black Friday

    By Robot Butt News Corp.December 28, 2017

    A press conference held this week to mark the holiday season turned controversial when December 26th told reporters that it…

    Life

    A Field Guide to Celebrating Kwanzaa With Your Christmas Family in Your Aunt’s Gentrifying Neighborhood

    By Pauline EkholtDecember 28, 2017

    Explain Kwanzaa to Your Aunt Pat Every year the day after Christmas, Aunt Pat forgets Kwanzaa is a cultural celebration…

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