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    Home»All Content»The Hub»Articles»Science»My First Day as a Robot Sex Worker
    Science

    My First Day as a Robot Sex Worker

    Kurt ZemaitaitisBy Kurt ZemaitaitisOctober 12, 2020Updated:October 12, 2020No Comments4 Mins Read
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    Sex Robot

    0600: Why not start early? I just left my job as an Amazon fulfillment center worker and wanted to try something way more exciting that also paid immensely better. This fits that bill. 

    0612: My first clients were a group of frat boys. Super late night apparently. I was pretty proud that I was able to pleasure them simultaneously with each of my appendages, my mouth, and my two other robot orifices. I’m currently saving up for a few thrusting mechanisms which would allow me to add two or three women to the mix. I may even get a detachable second head.  

    0651: My second client was a guy who just turned 18 looking to lose his virginity. I guess he wanted to do it before the school day. He barely unbuckled his pants before I gave him an orgasm to die for. It lasted precisely 17.672 seconds.  

    0701: This next one was a lonely guy who just wanted to talk and nothing else, which I hear occasionally happens. It didn’t bother me, though, since I grabbed another client twenty feet away behind a curtain and jerked him off with my telescoping arm.    

    0847: This client stayed long after we had sex and wanted to cuddle and then asked a lot of personal questions, like if I had a boyfriend or if I was interested in dating. I’m not at all interested in any sort of relationship at this time. This gig pays well and I’m exploring a side of myself that I really enjoy right now.  

    1003: This guy was really nervous about asking me to pee on him. It seemed a little boring, and I didn’t know how much fluid I should provide and when to stop.  

    1219: A husband and wife came in and wanted to fulfill a threesome fantasy. I changed my voice, hair color, eye color, skin color, weight, height, and breast size to what the husband wanted. Then the wife completely freaked out and hysterically stormed the hell out of the room saying I looked way too much like her sister. The husband stayed and had his way with me more violently than anyone yet.  

    1411: After letting me ride them for a ridiculous amount of time, three best friends got way too chatty and tried to save me and told me that I can’t do this forever. They also wanted to know what my future plans were. I know my looks won’t fade, but I’ll definitely have a slower processing system after upgrades I won’t be able to efficiently handle. But I’m hoping to upgrade my parts to become a surgical robot someday.  

    1658: My mother called and reiterated why she doesn’t want me to do this. She doesn’t understand that I’m a grown robot now and this pays very well. She’s just an older model of me and I’m just an upgraded model of her. 

    1806: An angry-looking biker dude came into my room next. He wanted to spank and whip me. Sure, I thought, do whatever the hell you want; practically everything about me is indestructible and what isn’t is easily replaceable. He went nuts and was getting off on it, but then he tried to cut into one of my circuit boards and spit on me which is where I draw the line, so I ripped his dick clean off.  

    2010: I had a middle-aged guy who was embarrassed when he couldn’t get it up. I grabbed his ass and injected a large dose of Viagra with one of my spring-loaded syringe fingers. He was ready to go within twenty minutes.  

    2107: Another sex robot came in as a “first day” prank, I guess. But I didn’t know right away. I had a feeling it wasn’t a human, but the dead giveaway was when we were into hour two of a violent thrust-a-thon and his battery started beeping. Once I figured it out, we both instantly stopped and had a huge laugh.  

    2314: I figured it was a good time to stop for the day and recharge. I think I’ve learned what men want. They just want to be intimate, feel validated, and get off with a lubricated servo that’s capable of one thousand pulsations a second.  

    Kurt Zemaitaitis
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    Kurt Zemaitaitis

    Kurt Zemaitaitis is a musician and humor writer published in Slackjaw, Points in Case, and random journals and magazines.

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