Disney recently announced that Frozen 2, the sequel to the hit animated film Frozen, will be released in 2019. But there’s another Frozen sequel to be made – one that occurs in the not-too-distant future, when the Kingdom of Arendelle has been affected by global warming. It’s called Frozen 3: Slightly Thawed.
Frozen 3: Slightly Thawed opens with Princess Elsa of Arendelle discovering her cryokinetic powers have evolved. Now, her left hand turns objects to ice, while her right hand melts everything she touches. She’s wreaking havoc in the kingdom as she causes rapid cycling through extreme weather. One day it’s 90 degrees, the next day is 14 degrees. “I’m melting,” says the snowman Olaf, shortly followed by, “Nope, wait, I’m firming up again.”
Anna, Elsa’s sister, is concerned. She’s now married to Kristoff. With the change in climate, Kristoff’s previous business (ice harvester) is no longer viable, but it’s okay with him since he married into royalty and doesn’t have to rely on his day job.
“I thought we wanted it to be warmer,” he says to Anna while he and Sven munch on carrots. “Remember all the trouble we went through to thaw this place out when it was a frozen tundra?” The rest of Arendelle, having previously experienced endless winter, is also lulled into a false sense of calm. “We like the mild weather,” the townsfolk say. “That 75-degree day in February was a nice change of pace for us, actually. Why ruin a good thing?”
The townsfolk decline to sign Anna’s petition on climate change. Anna tries to get Elsa to agree to limit the use of her right hand, but Elsa is too busy admiring her own power to listen.
Anna, worried about the future of the kingdom, ventures out to find someone who might be able to put a stop to the madness. During her travels, she encounters an ogre named Trumpelstilksin. “There is no global warming,” he tells Anna. “It’s a hoax perpetrated by the Kingdom of Weselton.” Trumpelstilksin promises to shower Anna with golden coins if she’ll stay with him in his grotto. Anna nearly falls for these alternative facts, but she realizes, with the help from a wise old snowy owl, that she doesn’t need Trumpelstilksin’s golden coins. She needs something far more valuable: the truth. Why have Anna’s powers evolved in this way?
Anna continues her quest to find someone who can help. As she walks on, she sees crocuses popping out of the snow. “That doesn’t seem right,” she muses. Anna experiences burning hot sun, severe winds, a snow storm, a rain storm, and a drought all in one week. Nevertheless, she persists.
Finally, Anna finds an ice castle. Inside she finds a team of scientists, trying to cool the melting blocks of ice that make up their castle and their lab, using large fans that run on wind power. Anna pleads with them, “I need you to restore the balance of my sister’s powers and save our kingdom. If you fix my sister’s powers, she can save your lab!”
“It’s too late,” the lead scientist tells her. “Unless your sister can restore our funding, too. Our budgets have been slashed.”
“We just have to get the word out,” says Anna. “We’ll tell everyone in my kingdom – I know they’ll help you. They’re very kind people.”
“They won’t care,” the scientists respond. “All they’ll want to do is take selfies in bathing suits, which works better in warmer weather.”
Anna, sobbing, runs outside into a blizzard. She makes her way through the unrelenting snow, asking herself, “How can my sister be causing the planet to get warmer? It’s freezing right now!” Just as she’s about to succumb to the violent storm, a scientist comes to her rescue, pulling Anna from a snow drift.
“I feel so helpless,” Anna gasps.
“We can still stop this from getting even worse. Let’s go back to your kingdom together,” says the scientist.
They travel back to the Kingdom of Arendelle, using a combination of low-emission vehicles, public transportation, carpooling, and bicycling. Just as they arrive, they find Elsa about to touch an iceberg with her right hand. If it melts, the kingdom will be flooded.
“Elsa, no!” Anna runs over and throws herself in between Elsa and the iceberg, getting a severe sunburn in the process.
“It’s not too late,” the scientist tells them, as she (did you assume the scientist was a man? Wrong!) tends to Anna’s burns. She outlines a program where Elsa can commit to a series of steps that will cool her hand back down and save the kingdom.
“I know it’s not the quick fix or magic ending you’d hoped for,” the scientist says. “But that’s not how this works.”
Elsa understands and agrees to the program. The Kingdom of Arendelle is saved slowly but surely over the course of the next few years. As the credits roll, it’s snowing once again. Olaf puts on a hat, scarf, and gloves. He finishes a drink of water and tosses the empty bottle into a recycling bin.
“I guess I can live with it,” he mutters.
THE END
