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    Robot Butt

    • Entertainment
      1. Movies & TV
      2. Music
      3. View All

      Title: We’re Rebooting “The Three Commandments”

      April 15, 2026

      How Smoking Your Cigarette Shows If You’re Evil

      April 3, 2026

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      John Hamm to Play Every Role in New Film, Even Inanimate Objects

      February 24, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      RE: My Upcoming Concert at Your Starbucks. 

      September 6, 2025

      After Drummer Porn Arrest, New Pornographers Look for Less Controversial Band Name 

      May 21, 2025

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      Why I Finished Reading That Terrible Book

      April 25, 2026

      Title: We’re Rebooting “The Three Commandments”

      April 15, 2026

      Welcome To Our TV Show Pop-Up Bar, Which Is Not a Scam

      April 14, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
      2. View All

      A Cartoon About Alarm Clocks

      February 4, 2026

      Happy Holidays! Here’s A Cartoon About Christmas Trees

      December 25, 2025

      The Riddles Of Dragon Hollow: An Ultra-Short Pulp Fantasy Parody

      September 20, 2025

      Tis Time For More Advice From The Advice Imp!

      September 10, 2025

      Elephant in the Examination Room

      April 26, 2026

      Coffee Comrades

      February 26, 2026

      THE THREE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE ARE NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS

      January 23, 2026

      Beckett versus Beckett

      October 4, 2025
    • History

      Seder hopping with the Passover King

      May 15, 2025

      College Students Suggest Causes for Fossilized Vomit

      April 30, 2025

      Oedipus’ Lament

      April 18, 2025

      10 Relevant Events in History that were Originated by a Joke

      February 20, 2025

      Valentine’s Day Musings From a Drunken William Shakespeare 

      February 13, 2025
    • Life
      1. Science
      2. Thoughts
      3. View All

      I Dated Four AI Boyfriends So You Don’t Have To

      April 27, 2026

      Peanut Butter is Coming Back to School!

      March 6, 2026

      Scientists Discover Trending Chimpanzee Fashion Statement: Sticking Grass In Their Ears And Backsides

      February 27, 2026

      Report: 80% Of People Looking At Their Phones On The Train Are Watching Porn 

      January 25, 2026

      Local Airline Pilot Takes Train To Work

      April 2, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      A Love Poem to Greenland written by J.D. Vance

      May 4, 2025

      College Improv Troupe or Alarming Medical Diagnosis?

      April 30, 2026

      I’m One Lie Away from My Dream Job

      April 29, 2026

      Tourist Tips to Avoid Screaming, “I’m an American who plays Dungeons & Dragons”

      April 28, 2026

      I Dated Four AI Boyfriends So You Don’t Have To

      April 27, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
      3. View All

      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super Bowl

      February 21, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      LIFEHACK: When Your Dad Texts You About Not Understanding The Bad Bunny Halftime Show, Reuse Your Responses From The Kendrick Lamar Halftime Show

      February 8, 2026

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026
    • Podcasts
    • Uncanny Valley
      1. Breaking News
      2. Company Blog
      3. Staff Posts
      4. View All

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026

      HEARTBREAKING: Middle Schooler With Mad Libs Book Out Of Bad Words

      January 26, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Chicago Friends, We Have A New Show Called “Open Mic Night At A Bowling Alley” Coming To The Annoyance Theater Wednesdays In March!

      February 22, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
      3. Submission Guidelines
      4. View All

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Jason’s Dozen: A Friday the 13th Humor Collection

      October 13, 2023

      Halloween Compendium of Terror: A Spooky Humor Anthology

      October 31, 2022

      College Improv Troupe or Alarming Medical Diagnosis?

      April 30, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      I’m One Lie Away from My Dream Job

      April 29, 2026

      Tourist Tips to Avoid Screaming, “I’m an American who plays Dungeons & Dragons”

      April 28, 2026

      College Improv Troupe or Alarming Medical Diagnosis?

      April 30, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      I’m One Lie Away from My Dream Job

      April 29, 2026

      Tourist Tips to Avoid Screaming, “I’m an American who plays Dungeons & Dragons”

      April 28, 2026

      College Improv Troupe or Alarming Medical Diagnosis?

      April 30, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      I’m One Lie Away from My Dream Job

      April 29, 2026

      Tourist Tips to Avoid Screaming, “I’m an American who plays Dungeons & Dragons”

      April 28, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Comics

    You Can Lead a Horse to Water…

    By Brandon HicksMay 29, 2018

       

    Life

    19 Post-Graduation Plans to Tell to Your Concerned Relatives

    By J.R. YoungblutMay 27, 2018

    1. You got an apprenticeship at a Bitcoin mining guild 2. You’re auditioning to be a crisis actor or freelance…

    Politics

    Other Commemorative Objects Donald Trump Jumped the Gun on Creating

    By Erik SternbergerMay 26, 2018

    Jared Kushner Silver Spoon Collection (with one spoon for each issue he has resolved) Travel Ban Beach Towels (reversible) Steve…

    Entertainment

    Pitch Notes From Meetings With Replacement Directors for ‘Solo: A Star Wars Story’

    By Erik SternbergerMay 25, 2018

    Quentin Tarantino Very Violent. Riffed for thirty minutes on how hard it would be to get blood and brains out…

    Entertainment

    Star Wars Jobs and the Quality of Their Health Insurance

    By Victoria EdelMay 25, 2018

    Stormtrooper You’ll get universal healthcare, but it’s administered by a large, intractable bureaucracy, like everything in the Empire. And if…

    Columns

    How Do a Couple of Empty Nesters Feel Less Lonely? Ask Dr. Mike!

    By Kevin Michael RoweMay 24, 2018

    Dr. Mike Hanek is a relationship expert, addiction specialist, and board-certified psychotherapist. He has spent his 35-year career answering your…

    Life

    Let’s Make This Go Viral: A Man With Dementia Writes a Touching Letter to His Family

    By Joseph ThomasMay 24, 2018

    As I sit here on my sofa near the end of a life that was full and good, reflecting, I…

    Politics

    EMPLOYEES MUST WASH HANDS BEFORE RETURNING TO WORK

    By Dakota JamesMay 23, 2018

    IT HAS COME TO OUR ATTENTION THAT SOME EMPLOYEES ARE NOT WASHING THEIR HANDS AFTER USING THE BATHROOM THE SIGN…

    Politics

    Additional NRA Scapegoats for School Shootings

    By Chaco DanielMay 23, 2018

    “The disease is youngsters who are steeped in a culture of violence. They’ve been drugged in many cases. Nearly all…

    Uncanny Valley

    If You’re a Child With a Terminal Illness, BP Will Give You a Real Stuffed Animal Curated From Its Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill

    By Zachary TruranMay 22, 2018

    Most kids with terminal illnesses have a favorite stuffed animal from a multibillion dollar corporate entity they grow to love…

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