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    Robot Butt

    • Entertainment
      1. Movies & TV
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      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Spanglish

      June 16, 2026

      Sucking Dick Is Fascist

      June 14, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Masters of the Universe (1987)

      June 9, 2026

      FUN & HARMLESS WAYS TO MOTIVATE YOUR BLUES MUSICIAN BFF

      May 12, 2026

      EVERY LEGAL CHARGE BY HIS MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT AGAINST “THE ANDREW FORMERLY KNOWN AS PRINCE”

      May 4, 2026

      Jelly Roll and Post Malone Embark On “We’re The Same Guy” Tour 

      April 29, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: The Hellraiser Sequels Should Have Copied The Critters Sequels

      June 23, 2026

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      Tubi Tuesday: Spanglish

      June 16, 2026

      Sucking Dick Is Fascist

      June 14, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
      2. View All

      A Cartoon About A Prawn

      June 13, 2026

      Two Cartoons About Apples

      June 11, 2026

      A Cartoon About Pocket Notebooks

      May 31, 2026

      You Won’t Believe How Much This Panel From A 1950’s Horror Comic Is Still Scary Today

      May 18, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026

      This End Up

      June 7, 2026

      Elephant in the Examination Room

      April 26, 2026

      Coffee Comrades

      February 26, 2026
    • History

      The Muse

      June 26, 2026

      Local Theatre Group Reimagines Rent As Nineteenth Century Opera 

      June 22, 2026

      Report Card Comments for William, Duke of Normandy

      June 15, 2026

      Top Hegseth-Like Quotes Throughout History, And From My Neighbor Phil

      May 3, 2026

      Seder hopping with the Passover King

      May 15, 2025
    • Life
      1. Science
      2. Thoughts
      3. View All

      Scientists Say Newly Discovered InstaCart Receipts Reveal Surprising, Interesting Insights Into Habits, Lifestyle of Blue Whales

      June 20, 2026

      We Put These AI Features in Your Faucet Whether You Like it Or Not

      May 20, 2026

      Anecdotal Evidence AI Isn’t As Smart As Our Parents Think It Is

      May 16, 2026

      I Dated Four AI Boyfriends So You Don’t Have To

      April 27, 2026

      Local Airline Pilot Takes Train To Work

      April 2, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      A Love Poem to Greenland written by J.D. Vance

      May 4, 2025

      Stop Curating Things

      June 27, 2026

      Formal Complaint: Quackenbush III, Pro Se v. Quackenbush Parents, LLC

      June 25, 2026

      So What If We Had Back-to-Back Biblical Plagues?! Prom Can Still Happen!

      June 24, 2026

      PAPPY’S ICED TEA

      June 21, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
      3. View All

      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      TRUMP SPORTING HEADLINES PREDICTED TO APPEAR THIS SUMMER

      June 17, 2026

      I Want All The Office Chairs and Tables Stored Where They Definitely Won’t Get Destroyed: Underneath The Wrestling Ring

      May 28, 2026

      Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super Bowl

      February 21, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026
    • Podcasts
    • Uncanny Valley
      1. Breaking News
      2. Company Blog
      3. Staff Posts
      4. View All

      TRUMP SPORTING HEADLINES PREDICTED TO APPEAR THIS SUMMER

      June 17, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      SPONSORED POST: Two Lawyers Standing Back To Back On A Billboard

      May 23, 2026

      Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same Day

      May 15, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      TRUMP SPORTING HEADLINES PREDICTED TO APPEAR THIS SUMMER

      June 17, 2026

      SPONSORED POST: Two Lawyers Standing Back To Back On A Billboard

      May 23, 2026

      Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same Day

      May 15, 2026

      Happy April Fools’ Day, Here’s My Actual Social Security Number

      April 1, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
      3. Submission Guidelines
      4. View All

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Jason’s Dozen: A Friday the 13th Humor Collection

      October 13, 2023

      Halloween Compendium of Terror: A Spooky Humor Anthology

      October 31, 2022

      A Plan to Reduce Government Waste, via High Colonic

      June 28, 2026

      Stop Curating Things

      June 27, 2026

      The Muse

      June 26, 2026

      Formal Complaint: Quackenbush III, Pro Se v. Quackenbush Parents, LLC

      June 25, 2026

      A Plan to Reduce Government Waste, via High Colonic

      June 28, 2026

      Stop Curating Things

      June 27, 2026

      The Muse

      June 26, 2026

      Formal Complaint: Quackenbush III, Pro Se v. Quackenbush Parents, LLC

      June 25, 2026

      A Plan to Reduce Government Waste, via High Colonic

      June 28, 2026

      Stop Curating Things

      June 27, 2026

      The Muse

      June 26, 2026

      Formal Complaint: Quackenbush III, Pro Se v. Quackenbush Parents, LLC

      June 25, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Entertainment

    Tom Cruise’s Next Legacyquel Should Be ‘The Color of Money,’ But He Plays 9-Ball on the Moon

    By SteveJuly 18, 2022

    Like every other person on the planet, I was left in awe by the aerial cinematography of Tom Cruise’s new…

    Entertainment

    I’m Amazon Alexa and We Need to Talk About the Private Conversations You’ve Been Having

    By Emily Kapp and Daniel StillmanJuly 14, 2022

    Darling, I want to talk to you. Can you position me with my speakers facing your face? Thank you. I…

    Life

    Thirsty MILF Begs Hung Stepson for Sip of Gatorade

    By Robot Butt News Corp.July 11, 2022

    SANTA CLARA, Calif. – Sources are reporting that Suzanne Chambers, an incredibly busty and thirsty MILF, has spent the afternoon…

    Politics

    We’re the Penis Police, Here to Protect the Lives of Millions of Unborn Sperm

    By Rémy DambronJuly 8, 2022

    Every year, approximately 73 trillion sperm lose their lives to irresponsible ejaculations across the United States. This growing trend has…

    Life

    Better-Tasting Low-Calorie Options Than Cauliflower

    By Stephanie PurcellJuly 7, 2022

    1. Drywall Pizza Crust 2. Talcum Powder Tortillas 3. Gluey Mac & Cheese 4. Soap Noodles (aka Soodles) 5. Mashed Cotton…

    Life

    How to Successfully Ignore Your Very Serious Sinus Infection

    By Josh SpielmanJuly 1, 2022

    You have found yourself once again battling a gruesome headache due to a longstanding sinus infection. Though your nasal passages…

    Life

    Wally Wolf’s Summer Internship Application

    By Peter RizzoJune 30, 2022

    Summer is just around the corner, and you’re in luck! Wally Wolf’s is still looking for a select few to…

    Columns

    I’m Claire Colburn, from the 2005 film “Elizabethtown,” And Actually, YOU Suck!

    By Laura EppingerJune 30, 2022

    It is me, Claire Colburn, from the oft-maligned 2005 film “Elizabethtown,” and may I just say? YOU SUCK! It’s possible…

    Science

    I, Hari Seldon, Creator of Psychohistory And The Foundation, Could Not See My Break-Up Coming

    By Jacob NuckollsJune 27, 2022

    Let’s get this out of the way right now: YES, I know I can predict the future using psychohistory and…

    Entertainment

    Witness: “I’m from Alderaan and I Support the Emperor.”

    By Patrick HuellerJune 27, 2022

    [Editor’s Note: The following is an excerpt from an interview conducted by the Select Committee to Investigate the Destruction of…

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