EVERY LEGAL CHARGE BY HIS MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT AGAINST “THE ANDREW FORMERLY KNOWN AS PRINCE”May 4, 2026
How to Stay Calm When Cursed Out by a Teenage Meth Tycoon While Teaching the Pythagorean TheoremJune 1, 2026
These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball AnticsJune 17, 2022
NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon January 22, 2026
I Want All The Office Chairs and Tables Stored Where They Definitely Won’t Get Destroyed: Underneath The Wrestling RingMay 28, 2026
Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super BowlFebruary 21, 2026
LIFEHACK: When Your Dad Texts You About Not Understanding The Bad Bunny Halftime Show, Reuse Your Responses From The Kendrick Lamar Halftime ShowFebruary 8, 2026
Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. VanceFebruary 6, 2026
Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same DayMay 15, 2026
Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!March 9, 2026
Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same DayMay 15, 2026
Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!March 9, 2026
Science I’m an Epidemiologist and This Is How I’ve Been Spending My Bribes From the Coronavirus ConspiracyBy Matthew SeelyOctober 5, 2020 I make a decent living as an epidemiologist, but this year has been especially good to me. As many of…
Politics The Zombie Apocalypse Isn’t Going Away So We Just Need to Live With ItBy Matthew SeelyAugust 28, 2020 It’s day 153 of the zombie apocalypse and honestly, at this point, I think we just need to learn to…
History Victor Frankenstein: We Should Delay My Disciplinary Review Until I Have Solved the Problem of the MonsterBy Matthew SeelyAugust 6, 2020 Dear Esteemed Members of the Board of Governors: It has been brought to my attention that the Board of Governors…