Author: Marcus Day

I’ve never been one for conspiracy theories, but more and more I’m starting to believe Tila Tequila that the Illuminati exists.   I say this because there has to be some grand, evil force behind the Hallmark Offensive that’s swept across our country over the past few decades. You see, holidays have shifted from annual celebrations of something someone told us happened in the past to near-constant stops at the Walgreens three blocks from your grandmother’s house to buy a $6 card and aluminum foil for the roast. At least, it’s shifted that way in my family. Use my grandmother’s…