Never File A Claim Welcome to GoodLuck, and congratulations on your fixer-upper. Chock-full of promise—somewhere under the dry rot. We’re insuring your property under one condition: never file a claim. Not for fire. Not for locusts. If a tractor-trailer redecorates your living room, tell guests it’s an intentional layout choice. As your agent—and the recipient of a 15% commission—I’m pleased to present the GoodLuck Declaration of Home Insurance. It’s a slab of legalese a hyper-caffeinated actuary wrote to keep your confusion current. Attempts to comprehend it have been linked to hair loss, worms, and ED. Ask our actuary. If you…
Author: John Mara
John Mara
Pushcart Prize nominee, Best of the Net nominee, Best New England Crime Stories finalist. Multi-genre writer with 40+ publications. Funny enough to want a nom du farce.