My Relationships–and my Sanity–Might Last Longer
Control F
To Find Things In My House So My Significant Other Stops Threatening Divorce
Seriously, you think I know where your matching sock is? Like I’m the only one who uses the dryer around here? Wait, I know I bought a birthday gift for my niece a month ago. Where did I hide it? Where are my glasses? My phone charger? Where’s that photo of your dad from his 1965 Mt. Everest hike we promised to scan and make copies of for the whole family for this weekend’s reunion? Where’s all that dry cleaning I picked up last week? Okay, so maybe I have a problem.
1.5x – 4x Speed
I Don’t Have As Much Time For This As You Think I Do
Sometimes when I have to get through something I totally despise, like cleaning the bathroom or sorting the garage. Could also prove useful with some colleagues, definitely with my husband–especially when he needs to finish a story I already know the ending to or when he tells me about the monotony of his work-from-home day. Honestly, I can process what you’re saying faster than you’re saying it.
Alt + E
Open Edit Options In The Current Program
For my husband, when he’s wearing the same flannel pants and t-shirt on Wednesday he had on Monday and I need a Hump Day evening out.
Ctrl + Z
Undo! Undo! Undo!
This is, hands down, THE virtual hack I wish I could manifest IRL. Tripping up the stairs in front of others? Undo! Saying something stupid or mean and having the exact wrong person hear it? Undo! Seeing the flashing lights of a police car in my rearview after flying through a speed trap because I was so invested in singing along with my favorite song? UNDO! Me singing karaoke after a few too many drinks? Everyone wishes they had this UNDO!
Copy and Paste
Mostly For The Weather
I know every day is a gift and that’s why we call it the present, but I would love to be able to copy that quintessential summer surf photo and paste it over today’s gray snow showers. A brilliant blue autumn sky with the perfect amount of colored leaves would be my default for months. Or, better yet, copy the mind-blowing sex we had on our beach vacation that one year and paste it onto right now.
Ctrl+Alt+Delete
For The Mind-Numbing Meeting
As in, all of the meetings. Let me pull up the Task Manager and get the hell out of here so I can Ctrl+F back in my office to find the life report I misplaced.
Ctrl + N
Create New Document
Maybe I can create a new life, perhaps in the Bahamas?
