First they came for my flag, and I said nothing.
Then they came for my culture, and I said nothing.
But when they came for my statues, I became a Confederate soldier.
As a white person, this year has been really hard. Ever since Obama took away my rights, life has been a living hell. When the liberals started calling out the Confederate flags on my property, I was so hurt that I had to defend my Southern culture. Sure, I’ve lived in New Jersey my whole life, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a country girl at heart. Unbelievable.
Then they went after my white power bumper sticker. White power isn’t like, a racist thing okay? I’m just proud of my culture. If there’s a Black History Month, and a gay pride parade, why can’t I be proud to be a white straight woman who is half Irish? They were oppressed too, once. I know struggle.
Then they came after my Confederate soldier statues, and I literally felt like someone murdered my family member. That’s when I knew I had to give up my modern life to suit up in my grey uniform even though it’s totally not my color. I literally bought a musket, and I’ve been camped out in front of a statue of some dead guy I don’t know the name of, trying to protect whatever is left of my Southern heritage. It’s time to defend the South once again, and now everyone’s calling me a racist. It’s like, so unfair.
I mean, sure the Confederacy was all about defending slavery and the right to own human beings, but it’s NOT a race thing, okay???
