EVERY LEGAL CHARGE BY HIS MAJESTY’S GOVERNMENT AGAINST “THE ANDREW FORMERLY KNOWN AS PRINCE”May 4, 2026
How to Stay Calm When Cursed Out by a Teenage Meth Tycoon While Teaching the Pythagorean TheoremJune 1, 2026
These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball AnticsJune 17, 2022
NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon January 22, 2026
I Want All The Office Chairs and Tables Stored Where They Definitely Won’t Get Destroyed: Underneath The Wrestling RingMay 28, 2026
Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super BowlFebruary 21, 2026
LIFEHACK: When Your Dad Texts You About Not Understanding The Bad Bunny Halftime Show, Reuse Your Responses From The Kendrick Lamar Halftime ShowFebruary 8, 2026
Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. VanceFebruary 6, 2026
Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same DayMay 15, 2026
Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!March 9, 2026
Inspired By Drake’s Work Ethic, We’re Going To Try To Release Three Articles On The Same DayMay 15, 2026
Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!March 9, 2026
Breaking News Person Craving Hot Dog Requests We Do Literally No Further InvestigatingBy Robot Butt News Corp.January 16, 2026 We’ve decided to honor their wishes at this time. Our thoughts are with their family through this difficult process.
Life I Didn’t Prepare a Piece for Today so Here’s a Paid Ad for a HotdogBy Walt BraleyAugust 1, 2023 *NOTE TO FELLOW EDITOR STEVE. REMOVE THIS TEXT WHEN YOU POST THIS. Oh crap, oh damn. I forgot to edit…
Life Joey Chestnut’s Stomach Has Words for JoeyBy Ronia SmitsApril 3, 2023 Hey Joey, it’s me down here. Your fucking stomach. Remember me? Seeing as you’ve already started preparing, I wanna get…