I decided to continue my takes on thinking of the ADHD moments that pop in my brain, and continue talking about movies.
Smoking is bad, son.
They can kill you, but there’s an evil way, and a good way.
You’ve seen the movies.
The villain comes into the room. He’s mean. He’s nasty. Or She’s Nasty, or Mean, before she kicks you, or he kicks you, and then comes out the cigarette.
In 2026, smoking a cigarette is the bigger crime for your villain.
In 1926, you were cool for smoking cigarettes – because lung cancer was cool then too.
However, having watched multiple movies, and seen people waiting outside the club, it’s important to stress the importance of proper cigarette smoking so you can determine where or not you’re dealing with Rick from Casablanca, or whether you’re a prisoner in a WWII-era historical drama.
The first way is the “True American Way.” That’s when the cigarette falls between the pointer finger and the middle finger. It shows class. It shows that you’re down to Earth, that you would do anything for the person that you love. That’s the real way. The hero way.
The second way is the “European Way” where you pinch the cigarette using the thumb and pointer finger. It shows “class” and “sophistication”, almost like I’m the art-ist, but you know that watching any movie that this person is always the one who betrays you. Always. Keep that in mind when someone in your office is smoking with you on the lunch break.
The last way is the super evil – Darth Vader evil – way. That’s when the cigarette is placed between the middle and ring finger, and you smoke it while covering your face, as if you were trying to suffocate yourself with your own hand, or just get that last bit of menthol goodness. These are the people who are evil from the very beginning, and you know that you’ll be seeing them shooting from the rooftops, like Ralph Fiennes in Schindler’s List.
But, we do have some honorable mentions. Cruella Deville with that long cigarette is the crème-de-le-crème of evil. I don’t know. There’s something just pure evil about someone smoking their cancer stick. It’s like, not only do you look evil holding your weapon but you could kill me from another state – that’s unfair.
So, son…don’t smoke, don’t vape.
It’s not good for your health.
But if you ever find friends or family that do – watch how they hold it.
You could be dealing with the hero of the movie, or the one that falls off the building at the end.
