Paramount Skydance is launching a hostile takeover bid for Warner Brothers Discovery after it lost out to Netflix for control of the legendary movie studio and media company. Robot Butt News has obtained several exclusive quotes from Warner Brothers Discovery executives about the corporate battle.
Warner Brothers Discovery Chairman of the Board Foghorn Leghorn said, “I say, boy, I say. Those Netflix folks are about as sharp as a bowling ball. Our grand studio is worth more than the measly seventy two billion they offered. I say, I say.”
Warner’s Chief Marketing Officer Yosemite Sam commented, “What in tarnation is that rackin’ sackin’ Netflix a talkin’ about? They ain’t even a biddin’ for our cable networks! Dad blame cheapskates!”
Vice President of Corporate Affairs Tweety said, “I tawt I taw a low-ball deal.”
Human Resources Executive Vice President Porky Pig said in a statement, “The neh, neh, neh, neh, Netflix deh, deh, deh, deh, deh, deal is not in the beh, beh, beh, best interest of our sh, sh, sh, sh, share hol, hol, hol, hol, team.”
Not all Warner Brothers parties are in agreement on the best deal for the company’s future. Vice President of Legal Affairs Daffy Duck said, “Netflix Deal!”
Chief Accounting Officer Bugs Bunny said, “Paramount deal!”
“Netflix Deal!”
“Paramount deal!”
“Netflix deal!”
“Paramount deal!”
“Netflix deal! Fire!”
Vice President of Legal Affairs Daffy Duck is immediately shot by Vice President of Animation Elmer Fudd. Daffy’s beak spins in circles before stopping on the back of his head.
Bugs Bunny commented, “Ain’t I a stinker?”
