WASHINGTON – According to multiple sources within the White House, the usually volatile President Trump has allowed his Twitter account to run silent for a prolonged stretch, thanks to the discovery of a fresh box of crayons.
“We were talking to him about how to handle this transgender rights situation and mid-sentence he opened a drawer in his desk,” said an anonymous staffer. “His mouth just dropped open. He looked up at us and slowly pulled out a 48-pack of Crayolas.”
Several of Trump’s aides reportedly tried to get his attention, with some staffers futilely jingling their keys, but at this point were unable to break his concentration.
“It was like he was in a trance,” said a top aide. “Just completely unreachable for hours.”
The bright side of the unlikely desk drawer discovery was that President Trump was far too absorbed in the crayons to recklessly attack someone via Twitter. His account lay dormant for nearly 24 hours after the crayon finding.
At least one staffer took this as an opportunity to call her family, something the fast-paced role doesn’t allow for very often. “I called my mom,” she said. “I told her the president was playing with crayons so I could talk for a little while. She didn’t seem surprised.”
Reports of the content of Trump’s drawings have varied. At least one depicted President Trump and Vladimir Putin while another appeared to show Trump’s “dream White House,” a sprawling estate with a giant wall, a golf course, and what looked like a gargantuan statue of President Obama apologizing.
At press time, the president had apparently worn at least six crayons down to nubs. One assistant offered him paper, but the leader of the free world opted to continue rubbing them on the surface of his desk.
