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    Robot Butt

    • Entertainment
      1. Movies & TV
      2. Music
      3. View All

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      John Hamm to Play Every Role in New Film, Even Inanimate Objects

      February 24, 2026

      Movie Theater Popcorn Almost Makes It To Regal Coca Cola Ad

      January 20, 2026

      Gilligan’s Island Press Conference: The Skipper Tilts at Windmills

      January 17, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      RE: My Upcoming Concert at Your Starbucks. 

      September 6, 2025

      After Drummer Porn Arrest, New Pornographers Look for Less Controversial Band Name 

      May 21, 2025

      DISCUSSION THREAD: Idris Elba’s Music

      May 16, 2025

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      John Hamm to Play Every Role in New Film, Even Inanimate Objects

      February 24, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      Just A Quick Anecdote About Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 And Frank Millar’s Graphic Novel 300

      January 29, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
      2. View All

      A Cartoon About Alarm Clocks

      February 4, 2026

      Happy Holidays! Here’s A Cartoon About Christmas Trees

      December 25, 2025

      The Riddles Of Dragon Hollow: An Ultra-Short Pulp Fantasy Parody

      September 20, 2025

      Tis Time For More Advice From The Advice Imp!

      September 10, 2025

      Coffee Comrades

      February 26, 2026

      THE THREE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE ARE NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS

      January 23, 2026

      Beckett versus Beckett

      October 4, 2025

      I Am a Business Person, and so are you

      September 27, 2025
    • History

      Seder hopping with the Passover King

      May 15, 2025

      College Students Suggest Causes for Fossilized Vomit

      April 30, 2025

      Oedipus’ Lament

      April 18, 2025

      10 Relevant Events in History that were Originated by a Joke

      February 20, 2025

      Valentine’s Day Musings From a Drunken William Shakespeare 

      February 13, 2025
    • Life
      1. Science
      2. Thoughts
      3. View All

      Scientists Discover Trending Chimpanzee Fashion Statement: Sticking Grass In Their Ears And Backsides

      February 27, 2026

      Report: 80% Of People Looking At Their Phones On The Train Are Watching Porn 

      January 25, 2026

      Eat More Maggots And Unleash Your Inner Neanderthal

      January 22, 2026

      An Open letter from the Doctor Who Claimed Peeing on Jellyfish Stings Helps

      January 14, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      A Love Poem to Greenland written by J.D. Vance

      May 4, 2025

      The Term ‘Gooning’ Has Ruined The Job Market For Henchmen

      April 8, 2025

      Dear Neighbor, I Assume The Hammering Coming From Next Door Is You Building Your Own Coffin Because I Plan To Kill You In The Night

      March 3, 2026

      An American’s Pocket Guide To British English

      March 1, 2026

      I’m So Excited To Spend My Life Savings On Being A Plus-One At Your Wedding

      February 28, 2026

      Why Are Dead People Still On My Phone Contact List?

      February 25, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
      3. View All

      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super Bowl

      February 21, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      LIFEHACK: When Your Dad Texts You About Not Understanding The Bad Bunny Halftime Show, Reuse Your Responses From The Kendrick Lamar Halftime Show

      February 8, 2026

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026
    • Podcasts
    • Uncanny Valley
      1. Breaking News
      2. Company Blog
      3. Staff Posts
      4. View All

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026

      HEARTBREAKING: Middle Schooler With Mad Libs Book Out Of Bad Words

      January 26, 2026

      Report: 80% Of People Looking At Their Phones On The Train Are Watching Porn 

      January 25, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Chicago Friends, We Have A New Show Called “Open Mic Night At A Bowling Alley” Coming To The Annoyance Theater Wednesdays In March!

      February 22, 2026

      Robot Butt Live’s Halloween Special Is Tonight! We Have Murder, Intrigue, And Improv!

      October 30, 2025

      Want A Free Robot Butt T-Shirt? I Will Give You One At This Week’s Robot Butt Live! Thursday Night At Second City

      October 28, 2025

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Chicago Friends, We Have A New Show Called “Open Mic Night At A Bowling Alley” Coming To The Annoyance Theater Wednesdays In March!

      February 22, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
      3. Submission Guidelines
      4. View All

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Jason’s Dozen: A Friday the 13th Humor Collection

      October 13, 2023

      Halloween Compendium of Terror: A Spooky Humor Anthology

      October 31, 2022

      Dear Neighbor, I Assume The Hammering Coming From Next Door Is You Building Your Own Coffin Because I Plan To Kill You In The Night

      March 3, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      An American’s Pocket Guide To British English

      March 1, 2026

      Dear Neighbor, I Assume The Hammering Coming From Next Door Is You Building Your Own Coffin Because I Plan To Kill You In The Night

      March 3, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      An American’s Pocket Guide To British English

      March 1, 2026

      Dear Neighbor, I Assume The Hammering Coming From Next Door Is You Building Your Own Coffin Because I Plan To Kill You In The Night

      March 3, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      An American’s Pocket Guide To British English

      March 1, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Life

    VISIT BEAUTIFUL ROCK BOTTOM!

    By Chris TurnerJanuary 19, 2026

    The Destination You Never Planned For But Somehow Always End Up At So you’ve moved back in with your parents…

    Life

    Do You Want To Delete Facebook? Here Are 10 Places You Can Still Post Photos Of Your Cool Truck

    By Walt BraleyJanuary 18, 2026

    For over a decade, the one thing keeping most of the population from finally deleting their Facebook and getting out…

    Movies & TV

    Gilligan’s Island Press Conference: The Skipper Tilts at Windmills

    By Paul Cesarini And Andy ShocketJanuary 17, 2026

    At a hastily called press conference flanked by Gilligan armed with a bamboo shaft, The Skipper accused the Professor and…

    Breaking News

    Person Craving Hot Dog Requests We Do Literally No Further Investigating

    By Robot Butt News Corp.January 16, 2026

    We’ve decided to honor their wishes at this time. Our thoughts are with their family through this difficult process.

    All Content

    Only Thing Stopping Man From Participating In Dry January Is Knowledge That 9 Modelos “Not Going To Drink Themselves” 

    By Robot Butt News Corp.January 15, 2026

    CHICAGO IL – In an astounding scientific discovery, a local dry January participant and the writer of this very article…

    Life

    An Open letter from the Doctor Who Claimed Peeing on Jellyfish Stings Helps

    By Alec BrownJanuary 14, 2026

    To whom it may concern, I don’t know how this got so out of hand. This isn’t even my area…

    Life

    You Can All Stop Worrying about AI. I Wrote a Policy Document

    By Rob PlotkinJanuary 13, 2026

    Subject: AI Policy Update Dear Colleagues, As we begin the new school year, I would like to address the elephant…

    Politics

     Popular Acclaim for the Grand Ballroom

    By Tom NavratilJanuary 13, 2026

    “The family farm used to be the backbone of this country, but now I tip my hat to all that…

    Entertainment

    200 Sweeps Responsey Awards: Backstage Drama and Notable Absences Define The Internet’s Biggest Night

    By Mike TodascoJanuary 12, 2026

    RFC-9110.NET—In a night that surprised absolutely no one, Status Code 200 continued its unprecedented dominance at the HTTP Response Status…

    Life

    Andrew Tate Whispers Affirmations While Doing Normal, Everyday Things

    By Kevin McPherson EckhoffJanuary 11, 2026

    Here are some affirmations Andrew Tate emphatically whispers as he goes about his daily routine. Try them out for yourself…

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