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    Robot Butt

    • Entertainment
      1. Movies & TV
      2. Music
      3. View All

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      John Hamm to Play Every Role in New Film, Even Inanimate Objects

      February 24, 2026

      Movie Theater Popcorn Almost Makes It To Regal Coca Cola Ad

      January 20, 2026

      Gilligan’s Island Press Conference: The Skipper Tilts at Windmills

      January 17, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      RE: My Upcoming Concert at Your Starbucks. 

      September 6, 2025

      After Drummer Porn Arrest, New Pornographers Look for Less Controversial Band Name 

      May 21, 2025

      DISCUSSION THREAD: Idris Elba’s Music

      May 16, 2025

      Movie Goers Excited to Sleep Through New Avatar Film

      March 2, 2026

      John Hamm to Play Every Role in New Film, Even Inanimate Objects

      February 24, 2026

      COUNTRY SONG TITLES FOR DOGS

      February 18, 2026

      Just A Quick Anecdote About Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 And Frank Millar’s Graphic Novel 300

      January 29, 2026
    • Fiction
      1. Comics
      2. View All

      A Cartoon About Alarm Clocks

      February 4, 2026

      Happy Holidays! Here’s A Cartoon About Christmas Trees

      December 25, 2025

      The Riddles Of Dragon Hollow: An Ultra-Short Pulp Fantasy Parody

      September 20, 2025

      Tis Time For More Advice From The Advice Imp!

      September 10, 2025

      Coffee Comrades

      February 26, 2026

      THE THREE HORSEMEN OF THE APOCALYPSE ARE NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS

      January 23, 2026

      Beckett versus Beckett

      October 4, 2025

      I Am a Business Person, and so are you

      September 27, 2025
    • History

      Seder hopping with the Passover King

      May 15, 2025

      College Students Suggest Causes for Fossilized Vomit

      April 30, 2025

      Oedipus’ Lament

      April 18, 2025

      10 Relevant Events in History that were Originated by a Joke

      February 20, 2025

      Valentine’s Day Musings From a Drunken William Shakespeare 

      February 13, 2025
    • Life
      1. Science
      2. Thoughts
      3. View All

      Peanut Butter is Coming Back to School!

      March 6, 2026

      Scientists Discover Trending Chimpanzee Fashion Statement: Sticking Grass In Their Ears And Backsides

      February 27, 2026

      Report: 80% Of People Looking At Their Phones On The Train Are Watching Porn 

      January 25, 2026

      Eat More Maggots And Unleash Your Inner Neanderthal

      January 22, 2026

      Thank You AI!

      January 6, 2026

      Daves Are Going Extinct 

      May 27, 2025

      A Love Poem to Greenland written by J.D. Vance

      May 4, 2025

      The Term ‘Gooning’ Has Ruined The Job Market For Henchmen

      April 8, 2025

      A Warning Guide for Limerent Newbies

      March 7, 2026

      Peanut Butter is Coming Back to School!

      March 6, 2026

      Dear Neighbor, I Assume The Hammering Coming From Next Door Is You Building Your Own Coffin Because I Plan To Kill You In The Night

      March 3, 2026

      An American’s Pocket Guide To British English

      March 1, 2026
    • Politics
    • Sports
      1. Basketball
      2. Football
      3. View All

      NBA Accidentally Drafts Grammy Winning Saxophonist Boney James

      July 28, 2024

      NBA Deems Draymond Green’s Latest Treatment a Rousing Success

      January 15, 2024

      These Ordinary People Were Victims of the Harlem Globetrotters’ Terrible Basketball Antics

      June 17, 2022

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026

      NFL Team Eliminated? Clueless about Football? Find a Favorite: A Pre-Super Bowl Connection Guide For Choosing YOUR Bandwagon 

      January 22, 2026

      Colorado Buffalo Replacement Mascot Part of Failed Conspiracy?

      September 30, 2025

      5 Ins and Outs for Your Super Bowl Party!

      February 9, 2025

      Woman Pretending to Like Sports to Sleep With Man Asks Him Which Soccer Teams Played in the Super Bowl

      February 21, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      LIFEHACK: When Your Dad Texts You About Not Understanding The Bad Bunny Halftime Show, Reuse Your Responses From The Kendrick Lamar Halftime Show

      February 8, 2026

      Hey, Uh, Did This Canva Template Just Invent A New Sports League?

      February 7, 2026
    • Podcasts
    • Uncanny Valley
      1. Breaking News
      2. Company Blog
      3. Staff Posts
      4. View All

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Lindsey Vonn Suffers Crash In Wheelchair Race At Hospital 

      February 17, 2026

      Seconds Before Competing At The Highest Level, Entire World Comes Together To Boo J.D. Vance

      February 6, 2026

      HEARTBREAKING: Middle Schooler With Mad Libs Book Out Of Bad Words

      January 26, 2026

      Robot Butt’s New Year’s Resolutions

      January 3, 2023

      This Internship is Already Teaching Me So Much

      July 17, 2015

      Meet Robot Butt’s New Intern, Darren!

      June 17, 2015

      I Am Going to Die in the Robot Butt Office

      April 24, 2014

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Chicago Friends, We Have A New Show Called “Open Mic Night At A Bowling Alley” Coming To The Annoyance Theater Wednesdays In March!

      February 22, 2026

      Robot Butt Live’s Halloween Special Is Tonight! We Have Murder, Intrigue, And Improv!

      October 30, 2025

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Is Closed Today! RIP Gene! Our Open Mic Night Is Still This Wednesday, March 4th!

      March 2, 2026

      Chicago Friends, We Have A New Show Called “Open Mic Night At A Bowling Alley” Coming To The Annoyance Theater Wednesdays In March!

      February 22, 2026
    • About Us
      1. Books & Zines
      2. Contact
      3. Submission Guidelines
      4. View All

      Stream The New Sketch Comedy Album Mr. Sandwich Right Now!

      August 15, 2025

      The Robot Butt Company Handbook: A Humor Zine Designed to Be Read at Work

      June 10, 2024

      Jason’s Dozen: A Friday the 13th Humor Collection

      October 13, 2023

      Halloween Compendium of Terror: A Spooky Humor Anthology

      October 31, 2022

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Canada, Mexico, and European Union Eagerly Build Trump’s Wall

      March 8, 2026

      A Warning Guide for Limerent Newbies

      March 7, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Canada, Mexico, and European Union Eagerly Build Trump’s Wall

      March 8, 2026

      A Warning Guide for Limerent Newbies

      March 7, 2026

      Dayton Bowling Center Announcement: Last Week To Claim February Lost And Found Items, Also Open Mic This Wednesday Night!

      March 9, 2026

      BREAKING: Your Oven Clock Has The Time Wrong

      March 8, 2026

      Canada, Mexico, and European Union Eagerly Build Trump’s Wall

      March 8, 2026

      A Warning Guide for Limerent Newbies

      March 7, 2026
    Robot Butt
    Life

    My Official Application to Be Your Second Wife

    By Elisa DienerJanuary 26, 2023

    Dear Sir, I am delighted to submit my application for the position of your Second Wife. I am highly motivated…

    Entertainment

    No Post Today. Instead, Here’s Shaquille O’Neal’s 1996 Single “You Can’t Stop The Reign” Featuring Biggie Smalls

    By Walt BraleyJanuary 25, 2023

    You know when you are supposed to be doing something productive and get sucked down a YouTube rabbit hole? You…

    Entertainment

    Season 3 Of White Lotus Should Take Place At The Nickelodeon Resort

    By Walt BraleyJanuary 24, 2023

    There are two things I know to be true about White Lotus. I personally don’t think either of those facts…

    Entertainment

    How to Tell If You’re in a Studio Horror Movie or a Prestige Horror Film

    By Walt Braley and Joe BlackstockJanuary 23, 2023

    So, you were startled awake during the night (again) and are finally starting to believe that whatever is happening to…

    Fiction

    ONE BIG MAC FOR MANKIND

    By George BeckermanJanuary 22, 2023

    Not many people know this but…when Neil Armstrong came down that ladder in July 1969 and took “One small step…

    Breaking News

    Earliest Dick Pic Found in Fallen WWI Veteran’s Letter to Widow

    By Mark ShadyJanuary 21, 2023

    CANOGA PARK –According to sources close to retired widower Ruth Snell – Farrell it was reported earlier this week that,…

    Life

    Bushcraft Survival Guide: Broke Down Car Edition

    By Lee BlevinsJanuary 20, 2023

    My car broke down on the side of the road, and I do not have the money to get it…

    Life

    Jesus’ Second Coming Postponed Due to Abysmal Rental Market

    By Sari EllenJanuary 19, 2023

    The much-anticipated Second Coming of Jesus, originally scheduled for 2023, has been postponed, according to sources close to Jesus ben…

    Sports

    Superstitious Sports Fan Addresses the Media Following Second Consecutive Loss

    By Tom RipponJanuary 18, 2023

    Before we get started, I’d like to thank Pete for nineteen incredible seasons here. I have no doubt he’ll do…

    Life

    Best Clickbait of 2022

    By Jesper SørensenJanuary 17, 2023

    PRESIDENT BIDEN FALLS ASLEEP DURING PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE A spokesperson from the White House has confirmed a persistent rumor that US…

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