Sports Fans Rejoice Knowing Corruption Only Present in Soccer
May29

Sports Fans Rejoice Knowing Corruption Only Present in Soccer

ZURICH – With the arrest of several high-ranking FIFA officials this week, sports fans around the world have breathed a collective sigh of relief knowing that corruption has finally been eliminated from professional athletic competitions. “I’m just glad they finally got the guys,” said Bob Smithers, an avid American football enthusiast. “It’s nice to know we don’t have to wonder about the legitimacy of the outcomes of games and...

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FIFA’s in Trouble Because Some Soccer Stuff Happened
May28

FIFA’s in Trouble Because Some Soccer Stuff Happened

On Tuesday, the entire roundtable of the most powerful soccer super-lords, called “FIFA” amongst themselves, were asked to return to the United States to face charges that their sport makes too much money or something. The whole thing seems like a real hullabaloo and would be better if it could just make some kind of sense. Seven to nine official ball-holders (right?) for soccer were rounded up in total from Zurich, where soccer may...

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