Taking Back Their School: Texas Kindergarten Class Begins Using Pistol as Hall Pass
Feb19

Taking Back Their School: Texas Kindergarten Class Begins Using Pistol as Hall Pass

ARLINGTON, Texas – Samanatha Glasier, a kindergarten teacher out of East Texas Elementary School, has recently made the decision to switch her hall pass from a rectangular block to a Magnum Desert Eagle Pistol. “I just felt the kids needed something more than a wooden block,and allowing them to have a pistol in the halls should help give us some peace in mind that our children are safe when they’re at school,” said Glasier, a...

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The Official 2018 Presidential Fitness Plan!
Jan22

The Official 2018 Presidential Fitness Plan!

It’s a new year, and that means a new you! This is the time for you to shape up, find that motivation and treat your body right – after all, don’t you want to live a long, healthy life? After President Trump’s physical results, everything we thought we knew about a healthy lifestyle has been thrown out the window, as the results showed our president being healthy as can be! Our newly created “Presidential Fitness Plan” will have...

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5 Emergency Alerts We Need in Our Lives
Jan21

5 Emergency Alerts We Need in Our Lives

Look, smartphones are great, but they’re also a constant reminder of how shitty life can be. One day your phone reminds you that your boss is pissed at you, and one day it says you’re going to die a fiery death from a fucking ballistic missile. Emergency alerts are supposed to be helpful, and though this was a huge mistake, it had me thinking, why aren’t there MORE emergency alerts to warn me about shit that actually happens? Here are...

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