Thanks for inviting me to your wedding! I’m so happy to be included. It speaks volumes that the person I booty call every Saturday and the occasional wine Tuesday has the kind of friends that would shell out $433.77 so he would have someone to grind with on the dance floor. It only took three days of awkward back and forth text messages to confirm that yes, a plus one was included. The fact that the English language has no plural second person unless you want to seem Texan is outrageous. Your wedding has already taught me so much. For example, that I very much do not want to seem Texan. I appreciate that your wedding website is password protected with a mix of capital and lowercase letters. I see someone was…