They’re calling it the “little popcorn who could,” across the nation. This seemingly regular order of theater popcorn has become an inspiring underdog as it almost made it all the way to the start of the Primate.
“Unfortunately, there were just a few too many hurdles in front of it.” Physicist and popcorn expert John Smoreway told us.
“The patron got to the theater a full fifteen early. We’re talking like Maria Menounos and trivia early. it never stood a real chance. It was obvious to all the predictors that it wasn’t going to make it before the end of the trailer for Scream 7. There’s a section where the music drops off and the sound gets real low, because they’re setting up a jump scare, and you could really hear someone just chomping down like crazy. It was tragic, really.”
