The Slip ‘N Slide seems like a toy that has been around forever. But believe it or not, there were summers before it. How did its existence come about? We sat down with a knowledgeable expert on the fun summer pastime to discuss its origins.
Robot Butt: Today we’re interviewing a historian of the Slip ‘N Slide, sitting here with us in the dark shadows, using a voice disguiser that makes him sound a lot like Darth Vader. Is it okay if we call you Darth?
Historian: I-
RB: Great. So as we understand it, the invention of the Slip ‘N Slide was actually the direct result of sibling bullying?
Historian: I’d say so, yes. To my knowledge. The Whammo brothers – Bo, Richie and… Stanley – grew up in rural Indiana. Bo and Richie were the eldest brothers, and closest in age. Aside from occasional cow tipping and watching some television in the 1950s, entertainment was scarce. So, little brother Stanley provided additional amusement, even if he didn’t consent. At all. Or so I’m told. One day on a family outing to a bowling alley, Bo, 14 at the time, and Richie, 13, threw a banana peel in eight-year-old Stanley’s path, causing Stanley to slip and slide the whole length of the bowling lane into the pins, and struggle to escape that terrifying bowling machinery. Richie laughed so hard his cheek muscles locked up and he had to be taken to the emergency room. Mom – er, the Whammo parents – lectured Stanley to be more careful.
RB: Wow, Darth. That sounds hurtful.
Historian: It was… I assume. Legend has it that within weeks, Bo and Richie stepped up their efforts to intentionally make Stanley slip and/or slide. They would race him home from school, and after beating him home (Stanley was a bit overweight since he found comfort in food), they would line the last few feet of the path home with trash bags coated in olive oil. Eventually, after many accidents that landed Stanley in the ER and brought the wrath of Da-er, Mr. Whammo, Stanley just began padding his clothing to be prepared for any situation at any time. Since the padding cut down on ER visits and hospital expenses, the parents found joy in their boys’ activities as well. Even Stanley occasionally smiled because it was the only attention he received.
RB: This just sounds like a sad story, to be honest. I’m not sure we can use the Slip ‘N Slide again without guilt. You’re kind of bringing us down, Darth.
Historian: I’m sorry. As months went by, and the crowd to watch the sibling shenanigans grew larger, observers began asking Bo and Richie for their own supplies to harass, I mean, play with, their own families. Bo and Richie began taping trash bags together with electrical tape, packaging these so-called inventions in old banana boxes from the grocer, and labeling the products “Slip ‘N Slide.” And they sold. So Dad and – I mean the Whammo parents, of course – thought maybe the product could be mass produced, and did some research. Soon after, the product hit toy shelves everywhere in the early ‘60s.
RB: Did Stanley at least see some profits from his torture?
Historian: No. Not at all. Meanwhile, product testing continued at home, all at the expense of Stanley.
RB: Product testing?
Historian: For new product ideas that never made it to the shelves. Spin Cycle was a Slip ‘N Slide meant for riding bicycles on, for instance, but you probably never heard of it because it resulted in numerous head injuries in testing. Slip ‘N Fly was more like a slide ending in a ramp that sent me – I mean the test subject – flying about twenty feet into the air with no landing strip. There was also Sling ‘N Slide, which was really nothing more than a slingshot sending the subject toward a harsh Slip ‘N Slide ending.
RB: Wow, these sound awesome!
Historian: [Sigh] The testing resulted in numerous spinal surgeries to correct damage to the test subject. Even some products that made it past the testing onto the market were recalled. The original Slip ‘N Slide is actually not approved for adult usage anymore… Stanley had to fight hard for that win.
RB: Is it true Stanley escaped his family and went into hiding? Legend has it that he was the marketing genius behind the 1980s Quilted Northern commercials featuring children using toilet paper as safety padding around the house and outdoors.
Historian: I did go on to do some good things. I mean, Stanley did – I can neither confirm nor deny, again because I’m not a member of the Whammo family.
RB: I also heard that Bo and Richie are still in better shape than Stanley? They started that senior bodybuilding gym a few years ago. It’s pretty rad.
Historian: [Walks off]
