Subway Sandwich Artist Pretty Fucking Judgmental About Request for No Vegetables
May24

Subway Sandwich Artist Pretty Fucking Judgmental About Request for No Vegetables

ASHEVILLE, N.C. – Subway patron Kevin Travers, 28, left the popular sandwich chain agitated Saturday after the sandwich artist on duty had a real fucking attitude about his request for a Chicken & Bacon Ranch sandwich with no additional toppings. “Really, that’s it? No lettuce, tomatoes, red onions, green peppers?” said the Subway employee, identified only as Brad, incredulously. “Not even some banana peppers, or maybe some...

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Ragtag Group of Misfits Soundly Defeated by Disciplined Team From Rich Part of Town
May16

Ragtag Group of Misfits Soundly Defeated by Disciplined Team From Rich Part of Town

The Riverdale Bullfrogs, a ragtag crew of underdogs, misfits, and outcasts, suffered a crushing yet utterly predictable defeat on Monday at the hands of the better-funded and more organized Mountain View Titans, by a score of 76 to 0. The Titans, whose snobbish arrogance proved to be well-founded, entered the game as heavy favorites, having won the state pee wee football league championship five years in a row. Despite a plucky spirit...

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