100 Words or Less: On Whatever It Is Tom Hanks Is Hiding

What are you hiding, Tom Hanks? It’s something big.

Peepholes in the SNL dressing rooms? A suitcase full of faces? Dog meat side business? Secret hug closet? World’s biggest snuff film collection? Walt Disney’s head? Adolf Hitler’s head? Both? Both, and you make them kiss? Dendrophilia? Skeleton basement? Nine copies of a book entitled They Were Just Following Orders? Zodiac Killer Etsy shop? The eighteen missing minutes from the Watergate Tapes? Screensaver of the dolphin slaughter from The Cove? Photos of an undocumented mass grave? A copy of Turner and Hooch?

We’re going to find out. We’re coming for you.

 




David Mogan

Author: David Mogan

David Mogan has joined Robot Butt to be on the right side of history. ALL HAIL OUR MECHANICAL OVERLORDS.

Share This Post On