At a town hall event in Arizona over the weekend, in front of a largely Hispanic audience, presidential candidate Donald Trump made the stunning revelation that he had purchased the prequel to Lou Bega’s hit single “Mambo No. 5” and would be willing to let it see the light of day if elected president.
“You have to give the people what they want” Mr. Trump explained. “And this is exactly what the Latinos have been waiting for, believe me. This song, it’s so good. You won’t believe how good it is. I’m pretty sure this is the thing you people have been waiting for.”
When pressed about the long-lost tune Trump said, “It’s a very sexual song. It’s much sexier than the ‘Mambo No. 5’. That’s why they wouldn’t play it…too sexy. There are a lot more names of girls, A lot more names than the first song, and that’s how you know. That’s how you know how sexual the song is.”
The undecided voters in the audience attempted to turn the topic to immigration or Trump’s proposed tax policy, though the candidate eschewed all other issues and spent the event trying to remember the new girls named in the song. At times it became clear that he remembered a name, but then reminded the crowd that he wasn’t willing to share the information until he was safely in office.
“There is no Hillary in the song. I will tell you that,” Trump yelled into the microphone after being asked a question about clean energy. “No Hillary. That’s your hint, so you know it’s good”