6 Types of Information You Can Reveal With a Cake

Gender Reveal Cake

In recent years, gender reveal cakes have grown in popularity as a fun and exciting way to discover the type of genitalia a baby will be born with. Bakers are usually slipped a piece of paper with the sex of the baby on it and from there they’ll add blue dye to the cake if it’s a boy, or pink dye if it’s a girl. It’s such an exhilarating way to get information delivered to you that we thought of other ways this method should be applied.

If You’ve Overdrawn Your Bank Account

Overdrawing is the worst and you’re usually unaware you’ve done so until your bank sends you an email a week after the first fee has hit. Wouldn’t it make the news so much better if instead of an email, they sent you a cake revealing the amount of money you owe inside? That way you have something to eat when you realize you owe the bank $200 in fees.

If You’re Getting an Android or iPhone for Christmas

You’ve asked for a smartphone for Christmas but which type are you going to get? Instead of the normal boring activity of unwrapping a Christmas present, you should be cutting into a cake. If you’re getting an Android, the inside will be green like their little robot mascot and if it’s an iPhone, you’ll find the death certificate of Steve Jobs!

If You’re Broke and Have to Move Back In With Mom and Dad

This could potentially be a very bad news day for you, so don’t make it harder on yourself by getting the bad news via a text message from your accountant. Instead, have a cake sent to you containing the potential bad news. If you can stay in your apartment the inside will be purple, the favorite color of your building’s supervisor, and if you’re moving back home the inside will be full of unused tissues that you can use to wipe away your tears.

If Your Boyfriend is Cheating on You With a Dave and Buster’s Waitress

This is a hard thing to find out, so ease the blow by having the bakery bake tiny little hearts into the cake if your boyfriend has remained faithful, and if he’s two timing you, a bundle of arcade tickets.

If Steven Tyler is Your Father

Steven Tyler has fathered a lot of children in his day so there’s a good chance he could be yours too. If he’s not your father you’ll find a regular vanilla cake for you to enjoy, but if he is your father you’ll cut open the cake to discover it’s full of scarves.

If Your Niece is the Antichrist

There’s a possibility that your niece is an individual so evil that Jesus Christ himself will return to earth just to defeat her and save us all once again. Heavy stuff, so let’s make the reveal lighter with an angel cake! If she is the Antichrist the inside will contain a singular upside-down cross and if she’s not, the inside will be chocolate, her favorite flavor!

 

 




Briana Haynie

Author: Briana Haynie

Briana is a comedy writer, video editor, and improviser living in New York City. She currently writes and edits for the political humor website CAFE and has contributed to Reductress and Above Average. You can find her on Twitter @BriHaynie or purchasing a croissant at a Dunkin' Donuts.

Share This Post On