SILVER SPRING, Md. – Citing the importance to one’s overall health and well-being during the summer, the Food and Drug Administration recommended this week unlimited servings of the three essential B’s: babes, brews and buds.
“The value of keeping summer as chill as possible cannot be underestimated in regards to one’s health,” said FDA commissioner Robert Califf. “We have found that it is in the public’s best health interest to load up on bangin’ babes, the best times with buds and, of course, the coldest brews possible.”
“Without healthy doses of all three, one can expect a summer of serious, undesirable consequences.”
The agency’s recommendations highlight a 456-page “Guide to Summer Health,” with the report stressing the need to ensure the babes, brews and buds are flowing at a steady, equal pace all summer long, “especially on those long, cloudless weekends where life seems limitless and the only thing that matters are the bros and babes around you who know how to keep it real.”