Blood Diamond Still Really Pretty

Blood Diamond Still Really Pretty

MINNEAPOLIS – Though they are aware of the lax international diamond trade regulations, and the human rights violations surely committed to produce their engagement ring, local couple Mike Barrett and Karen Schreiber had to concede the ring was “still just gorgeous.”

“Oh yeah, look at that color,” Schreiber said. “It draws your eye right to it.”

While the couple conducted extensive research on the blood diamond trade, and even considered opting for a nontraditional gemstone in place of a diamond, ultimately the sales rep at Kay Jewelers convinced them of their purchase with a whispered, “Everybody does it.”

“I’m sure a lot of Zimbabwean warlords are getting rich off of this,” Barrett said. “But could you ask for a better cut? And Karen just loves it.”

Upon seeing the ring, Schreiber’s friends declared it to be “so beautiful,” “elegant,” and “worth every indentured servant.” As for the couple, they express no regrets over the purchase.

“Whaddaya gonna do?” Barrett said.

At press time, Barrett and Schreiber had stopped off at a local candy store to pick up some Hershey slave chocolate.



Robot Butt News Corp.

Author: Robot Butt News Corp.

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