The Waffle Crisp Mascot Has Seen Some Shit

Waffle Crisp Mascot

Those eyes. “Free me from the pain of this existence,” they say. “I am prepared to meet my Creator,” they say.

That stare. The way it looks so far beyond you, as if you don’t even exist. Like it is wholly transfixed on a dark and inescapable past, full of horrors unseen to the rest of the world.

That smile. Plastered onto his face and terrifying in its frozen state, this is the surest sign of someone who has been mentally broken in every possible way.

Why exactly does the Waffle Crisp mascot look so willing to die? What has he had to see or do in his life that has broken him in such a way? Whatever his reasons are for having a death wish, they don’t matter. If the cereal’s mascot is so willing to end his life, who are we to stand in the way? We should oblige, not just to free this tortured soul, but to indulge in some of the most delicious cereal out there.


Steve DiMatteo

Author: Steve DiMatteo

Steve is an editor for Robot Butt. You can follow him on Twitter @steve_dimatteo.

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