Where Does Free Pizza Rank Among the Greatest Things on Earth?

Couple eating pizza

“We’ve both done terrible things to each other, but that doesn’t mean we can’t come together for FREE pizza!”

Pizza rules, and the only thing that makes it better is when you get pizza without paying for it. So where does free pizza rank among the greatest things on Earth?

Pizza in and of itself is no doubt a top-ten thing for a variety of reasons, which include:

  • “Bad” pizza is still great
  • It can be part of any meal
  • It’s excellent both hot and cold
  • You can easily eat an entire pizza and not feel any shame for it
  • No one hates pizza; if someone claims to not like, they’re flat-out lying
  • It’s the only food that can truly take any party up a notch

There is, of course, the cost factor involved with pizza. Pizza costs money. Sometimes, the best pizzas out there cost even more money, enough to make a noticeable dent in your wallet. For that reason, we have to knock it down a few pegs.

But free pizza? That’s an uninterrupted path to glory. Free pizza often saves what would be an otherwise terrible experience, such as: meetings, office parties, late nights, work in general, etc. Free pizza also enhances already awesome things, like parties, sleepovers, the last day of school and Fridays (an ability that can never be overstated).

It’s pretty damn hard to top, but free pizza is probably, at worst, one of the top-three greatest things on Earth.



Steve DiMatteo

Author: Steve DiMatteo

Steve is an editor for Robot Butt. You can follow him on Twitter @steve_dimatteo.

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