So Now We Can’t Bathe With Mayonnaise in Public? What’s Next?

Mayonnaise Man

Our rights as Americans are being infringed upon on a daily basis.

The latest case of this ongoing travesty comes from Oklahoma, where a man – Jorge Perez – was simply minding his own business before being harassed by the cops.

That’s right, Perez was just trying to take a bath in a local public fountain, washing his hair with mayonnaise, perhaps a strategy for maintaining its health. Apparently, this scared a number of people who witnessed it happen, but why were these sick Peeping Toms staring in the first place? Either they were upset they didn’t think to do it themselves or they were simply squares, but regardless, the cops were called.

When the officer arrived on the scene, Perez was soaking wet (naturally) and breathing heavily, but that can easily be explained by the fact that he was caught off-guard by having to speak to the police in the first place. How would you like it if the police just busted into your bathroom while you were showering, ready to pepper you with questions?

This American hero was arrested and booked into Oklahoma County jail, though he was released the next day.

But the situation is far from over. This is just another example of the militant police forces of the country taking over, preventing Americans like Mr. Perez from exercising their God-given right to bathe in public.

While you sit on your Facebook and Twitter, mindlessly gossiping about celebrities, there are real issues taking place in this country. Wake up, people – our rights as American “citizens” are gone!



Steve DiMatteo

Author: Steve DiMatteo

Steve is an editor for Robot Butt. You can follow him on Twitter @steve_dimatteo.

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