Link-Sharing Protocol, Version 4.0: Being Robbed? Why Don’t You Just Chill Out?

The World Cup is coming to Brazil this summer, but if you’re planning on going down there to support your country, keep these things in mind:

  • You’re probably going to get robbed
  • When you do, just let it happen, and possibly even consider asking the robber if he/she needs any help in finding something of yours they want

A pamphlet will be passed out advising visitors to not “react, scream or argue” with their assailants, because that will only make things worse (like, you know, murder). You’re there to have fun and enjoy some soccer, so why bother getting upset over having everything stolen from you?

World Cup Brazil

  • Everyone’s favorite world leader, Kim Jong-un, will now be getting his own video game, appropriately titled Glorious Leader! Naturally, Dennis Rodman makes an appearance.
  • Andy Samberg hosted the season finale of Saturday Night Live, which meant we were blessed with another video to a Lonely Island song.
  • The Toledo Mud Hens are hosting a “Ghostbusters Night” at the ballpark on May 30, and they got Bill Murray to record a promo for it as Harry Carey.
  • Paleontologists have discovered sperm that is 17 million years old, belonging to an ancient muscle shrimp known as an ostracod. Uncoiled, this sperm can reach up to ten times the length of the ostracod itself, meaning it had some pretty gigantic sperm. The world of hentai is rejoicing.
  • Dan McQuade, who is a fantastic maker of GIFs, reminded us all on Sunday of the time the Phillie Phanatic beaned his own mom with a pitch.
  • The first images from The Simpsons/Family Guy crossover were released last week, and it feels as weird and funky as you figured it would upon seeing them.
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Steve DiMatteo

Author: Steve DiMatteo

Steve is an editor for Robot Butt. You can follow him on Twitter @steve_dimatteo.

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